Jolly Green Notwearingpants

I couldn't decide which one was worst in this picture....

...until I saw this one.

But I'll still let y'all decide. Things to consider before voting:
1) I've found similar items to the black SOD that even Forever21 calls a shirt.
2) Green's dress, on the other hand, can be found at stores that strippers shop at.

Your baby's gonna fall out!!!

Seriously, lady. I hope that's just a Chinese food baby... if not, I do NOT want to be around when your water breaks.