Smoking Stunts your Growth!

And, apparently, your dress.
C'mon! She stole that off her Barbie. Which means she's too young to smoke.

Her best friend Leslie says...

..oh she's just being Miley!
And you thought Britney Spears was a bad influence...

You're too young to wear a shirtordress little 8th grader!

My mother called me this weekend about the middle school dance she chaperoned on Friday. My mom reads my blog and a bunch of her teacher friends at school read my blog so the first thing she said was "There were so many shirtordresses and heels at the dance tonight. I could have taken pictures for your blog!" I'm not going to post pictures (OBVI!) of 14 year olds dressed as skanks madre wouldn't want that anyway, but seriously??!! I don't think I even had a pair of heels until I went dress shopping for the homecoming dance freshmen year of high school.

Middle Schoolers. Wearing shirtordresses. Somehow I can't imagine little Ashley A. passing a note to Johnny from Ashley B. asking him to check "yes" or "no" do you like me? Also, boys are ALREADY shorter than you. Must you further smack their ego in the face by upping the height difference an extra three inches or so? Listen, girls, put on your Hannah Montana t-shirts and converse sneakers and head to the dance. Come back to the shirtordresses in 4 or 5 years at least wait til prom. And send me a picture so I can ridicule you in my blog. Now go do your english homework. That essay on "Animal Farm" isn't gonna write itself Kthanksbye.